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Charlie Brown Christmas Tree Inspires…

I got the greatest Christmas tree the other night… Yes, A Charlie Brown Christmas Tree! IT’S AMAZING! :)

While decorating my glorious tree, I got in the holiday spirit and decided to rewrite a Christmas classic for our GoVacuum December newsletter (with some editorial help from Mike, who actually plays Santa in our GoVacuum Christmas video).

Anyhows… Here is what I came up with…

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, except for a Roomba 530,
It vacuumed the carpet that ever so dirty,
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of T2 Steam Boy’s danced in their heads;
And mamma in her ‘kerchief, and I in my rags
Had just settled down after changing the EZ Bagz.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew in a Pronto,
Tore open the shutters and looked below.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a Monster! Not eight little reindeer!

I thought for a moment shouldn’t this be St. Nick?

Wanna hear what happens next? Click Here, but Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!

What? You don’t get the GoVacuum newsletter? Why not it’s filled with cool quirky things I write and fun products, sign up and you’ll be entered to win a robotic vacuum too! Click Here… justin@govacuum.com

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When you can’t think of anything good to blog about…

I’m having writers block again… I think the Pacific Coastal Highway is calling my motorcycles name, but that will have to wait until the Fall passes and the leaves are cleaned with the Irobot Looj gutter cleaning robot with free shipping.

Until then I’ll just pretend to have something interesting to blog about, like Powr-Flite floor dryers… okay so maybe that’s not interesting, but if I don’t blog, I don’t get a paycheck… so, blog, blog, blog… Yippee! I get paid! Now grab that vacuum cleaner and GoVacuum or I’ll turn in to a Monster Steam Mop EZ-1!

Oh… yeah, a misfit had a Birthday also, how did I forget that? “Mark” is one of our marketplace specialist. He has been in the vacuum business for 6 years. He is the backbone of Govacuum (yes, he forced me to say that). He claims to only be 26 (I claim 26 also) HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHIRAN! (Mark is his nickname after we caught him watching Marky Mark & The Funky Bunch on Youtube, yes in 2011! For a while it was Marky, but just as Mr. Whalburg, he prefers Mark to Marky)


Nonetheless, we like the guy and we celebrated his 40th Govacuum style with a lunch of pizza and hot wings :)

Ideas people… I need ideas! justin@govacuum.com

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Daily Deals… No Thank YOU!

Okay, I get informed by big boss man yesterday, I would have to attend a product launch from a leading vacuum company last night. Grrrrrr… this would effect my hectic work schedule, but he informed me there would be an open bar and free food, two of my favorite things, so I was happy to go!

Just as I finished up my 11th piece of salmon and capping off my second bottle of red grape juice, I was informed by that said boss man, he wanted to “increase my duties” at the company…. :(

No… No… NOOOOOOOOO!!! I’ve worked hard to get to this point of slacker and he wants to ruin that with work? Before I could react, he asked me if I knew what a daily deal was. I tried to pretend my hearing aid battery was low, but he knew I had just replaced them, because we had a conversation about them a day before, as he suggested I should get rechargeable vacuum batteries to use in them (I said he was scary looking, never funny).

He wasn’t buying it, he told me I need to start a daily deal section of our website and everyday I would need to offer a new discounted vacuum deal. Needless to say, that third bottle of juice was finished off rather quickly. What could I do? I felt deceived, but no one else will hire me sit in a hammock and blog all day, so I’m left with no other choice, but to say… without further delay. Drum Roll Please…. Introducing GoVacuum Daily Deals!

Everyday yours truly will have one of the GoVacuum misfits rummage thru our warehouse and find a product we have too many of, then I’ll go ahead and write something witty about it and come up with a huge discount off the regular price (Woot rip off much?).

A lot of items we’ll take a loss on, but it’s better then paying rent stocking these items in our warehouse. Some items will be vacuum cleaners that are new in the box, some will be returned open box returns that are in like new condition with fully warranties, some might be robotic vacuums or whatever we might find in the warehouse!

The good news for you, our customers is you will have savings as high as 90% off the regular price! Just check our website everyday to see what’s being offered, but buy quickly and think later! Daily Deals will be limited in quantity and you have 30-60 days to return them and we even pay shipping both ways! Just buy the items and if you don’t like them return them, zero risk or cost to you! My theory is if enough people buy stuff to try it out then return it, our daily deals will make use loose so much money he will stop the daily deals and I can get back to slacking! :) The bad news for me, is now I currently have to work between Jerry Springer and Maurry… :(

Excludes Miele products. Think I can turn this in to a “weekly deal” instead? Have an idea about how I can get out of doing work? Email me: justin@govacuum.com

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Sunday! Sunday! Sunday! Or is it?

I woke up the other morning at 1:11 pm and smiled, as this was obviously a sign of good luck and a great day ahead!

Like the commercial they play on the radio all the time, it was… Sunday! Sunday! Sunday! Was there a great sale going on at the Dulles Expo Center? Nope, but there was the Capitol Home Show and seeing as how I had free ticket, I figured… why not go?

I got out of bed, played with my Looj. Get your mind out of the gutter! That’s where the Looj belongs. You don’t know about the Irobot Looj automatic gutter cleaner? Then you should check out my previous blog about it here (it’s such a cool toy) or buy one as they are now 10% off and with Fall just around the corner leaves will be falling soon, now is a great time to buy a Looj!

If you’re not familiar with GoVacuum we are located just outside the Nations Capitol of Washington D.C. where the clouds are lost (not just the politicians). The overcast morning was not aware this is Washington the city, not the state… Seattle is on the west coast, clouds please go away!

It started raining here one day in early September and it seems like it hasn’t stopped since. I figured taking advantage of the big Dulles Expo Center and its nice bright indoor lights with beautiful non leaking roof, as this would be a great way to spend a gloomy Sunday.

I arrived at the Dulles Expo Center, handed my ticket to the bouncer at the door and he looked at me like I was crazy or something. The ticket was valid for Sunday only, this I knew. He proceeded to say some very lucky words, “It’s not Sunday, it’s Saturday!” What the heck? Did I really loose track of a whole day? Did a day really lose me? Apparently so!

I smiled. Always an opportunist, never allowing any day to get the best of me and always attempting to live life to the fullest like Garfield the cat does. I drove back home and decided to go back to sleep until it was Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!

Ever lost a day? email me and tell me about it! justin@govacuum.com

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